The fact of the matter is that power plays a critical role in human relations, even though our relationships are grounded in love and mutuality, a desire for equality and fairness, and community and collaboration.How do we balance destructively aggressive and defensively hostile influences with healthy competition and cooperation?Make sure you sound truly delighted even as your soul is dying inside. But when he’s explaining something and you already know that, it might be tempting to say “I already know that.” Instead, have him explain it to you over and over again.
One way to do that is to alter your leadership style to account for the (sometimes) fragile male ego. This makes him feel less like you’re telling them what to do and more like you care about his opinions.
Given the persistence of abuse and harassment across the spectrum of human relationships, from family, to friends, to professional relationships—indeed to one’s relationship with oneself—more than ever we face a growing need to question intimidation dynamics, closely examining the underlying conscious and unconscious motives in order to extricate ourselves from the shadowy history of chronic maltreatment of one another.
Once we’ve begun to deal with intimidation, we’ll be able to move forward with constructive and possibly reparative conversations to establish better norms.
Being told we are intimidating—and more so becoming aware that we actually have been intimidating—can be a bitter pill to swallow.
Yet it is essential to understand our own tendencies toward intimidation if we are to refine our relationships with one another, and with ourselves. We’re often self-intimidating, using pressure and coercion to motivate ourselves.