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If you’re angry with a man for something he did or didn’t do, ask yourself if you’re tolerating bad treatment, or if you’re stuffing down your feelings and pretending everything’s okay.Control is about fear – we’re afraid of what might happen, so we try to manipulate a situation in order to minimize the chances of getting hurt.Give him a chance to be part of the issue and to come up with a solution that works for both of you.
But doing this causes a man to resist since he doesn’t want to be told what to do or how to do it!
So before you even speak to him, take the time to get real with yourself and understand where you’re coming from so you’re better prepared to approach the topic with a calm mindset and attitude.
When you feel anger toward the man you’re with, this is often a sure sign that you’re simply doing too much in the relationship – what some experts call ‘overfunctioning.’ Overfunctioning involves working hard to win a man’s attention and affection, and it also happens even when you’re spending a lot of time just thinking or talking about him.
And the reality is that you’re angry with yourself for doing so much to begin with.
This is when it’s important to take a step back and address the issue: are you mad at him for his actions, or frustrated with yourself for going above and beyond, without receiving anything in return? Once you can address and determine why you’re feeling this way you can begin to know how to control your anger effectively.